I’m a prime time newsreader on a popular television network. The news room has just handed me the lead story for tonight’s bulletin. It’s about a fire at a local day care centre. Apparently a heroic dog managed to drag 37 burning toddlers from the sleeping building (sorry, other way ’round – I’m in a panic!).
Anyway, the dog saved the children’s lives and is being hailed a hero. He’s even being presented with a State Medal for Bravery next week at a formal ceremony at Parliament House (plus a lifetime’s supply of Schmackos!). It’s basically the feel-good story of the year – a journalist’s dream.
My problem? The dog’s name is “Scrotum”. How the **** am I supposed to say this on air and keep a straight face?
Between a Dog and a Hard Place
I think you’re being very selfish. Why would you want to deny poor Scrotum his well-deserved 15 minutes of fame? He’s out there actually doing things, making a difference, walking the walk, barking the bark, eating the Schmacko. He’s busy building a notable career as a saviour of toddlers and a provider of feel good news stories.
All you do is sit there with a phoney smile and read a TelePrompter.
Hope this helps.
With kind regards,