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Terror at Three Thousand Feet

March 17, 2017 by The Yak Leave a Comment

Dear Yak,

My boyfriend is terrified of heights. So I’m treating him to a nice hot air balloon ride over the city for his birthday. In a REALLY big balloon. Like, one that can climb to about three thousand feet.

As he’s a sensitive type, I was going to spring it on him at the last minute. But he somehow found the confirmation email from the balloon company and now he’s completely freaking out about it. (Serves him right for snooping).

I keep telling him the best way to conquer his fear is to face it head on. But he’s not listening to me. As usual. What can I do to calm him down and convince him this is really for his own good?

Yours sincerely,

Happy Birthday Darling

Dear Happy Birthday Darling,

Yes, you clearly do know what’s best for him. Why isn’t he more grateful that you’re constantly looking out for his interests?

It’s true we all fear something. Heights… spiders… job interviews… violent decapitation. In fact, I believe that a person’s greatest fear tells you a lot about who they really are. You know, at a deep, psychological level. Far more than the Myers-Briggs test. Or whether you let the toilet paper hang against the wall or away from it.

Take me for example. My greatest fear is having to sit through someone else’s boring travel photos. Especially when there might be one of them in their swimwear. (Eew!) But I don’t let this fear affect my quality of life. I bravely look at the  photos and nod and smile and make appreciative comments. Then quietly throw up in my mouth. Simple.

So I wouldn’t worry too much about your boyfriend. Something tells me he’ll be able to cope just fine on the big day. I mean, he’s already used to being in close proximity to lots of hot air, so it’ll probably end up being a piece of cake.

Hope this helps.

With kind regards,

The Yak

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