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Scorn and Derision in the Dog Park

August 11, 2017 by The Yak Leave a Comment

Dear Yak,

It was my wife’s birthday last month and I gave her a rescue dog from the local shelter. He’s an adorable 6-year old Jack Russell, her favourite breed.

The problem is she’s decided to name the dog “Scrotum”. At first I thought she was joking, but it’s been over a month now and she’s still calling him that. She’s even put the name on his food bowl. Even worse, the dog now responds to it. Whenever I take him to the dog park and I have to call out his name, everyone looks at me weirdly. It’s totally embarrassing.

I’ve asked my wife to pick another name. But she just says I’m being an “over-sensitive, insecure male”. What do you think, Yak? What should I do? It’s driving me crazy.

Yours sincerely,

Barking Mad

Dear Barking Mad,

Lol. That is indeed a dilemma. Wrapped in a predicament. Surrounded by a problem. Called Scrotum.

I can see you’re quite upset about this, but to be honest, I don’t think there’s much I can say that will help you. (Scrotum. Scrotum. Scrotum. Scrotum. Scrotum. Scrotum.) Everyone knows that a dog’s name on its food bowl is legally binding. It looks like the Universe wants you to suffer public scorn and derision whenever you go to the dog park. Just be thankful it’s the dog and not your firstborn child.

Hope this helps.

With kind regards,

The Yak

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