Dear Yak,
My 98-year-old grandmother died last week. Since I’m the only competent family member, I’m in charge of organising the funeral.
Oh Yak, I don’t want this to be just another ho-hum service. You know, where everyone sings the same old tired hymns and then stands around looking bored while the coffin is lowered into the ground.
Grandma was a sparkling, mischievous woman who had a wicked sense of humour and led a fairly unconventional life. I want her funeral to reflect that. But there’ll be a lot of fairly conservative older people there as well, so I don’t want to offend anyone either. How can I strike this delicate balance?
Yours sincerely,
Good Mourning
Dear Good Mourning,
Yes, I know what you mean. Funerals can be such gloomy affairs. But it doesn’t have to be this way. There’s nothing like a good, high-spirited funeral game to liven up the proceedings and give people a bit of a laugh.
My own personal favourite is Catch The Wreath, which is guaranteed to make any funeral memorable. This is modelled on the popular tradition of throwing the bridal bouquet at weddings. Throw the funeral wreath over your shoulder to the crowd of mourners. Someone’s sure to catch it. Point at them and say “looks like you’re next!” This is especially funny if it’s an old person.
Hope this helps.
With kind regards,
The Yak
Dear Yak
Everytime I feel l Iowly, I at last know that there is something to cheer me up. You! Reading The Yak your extremely witty column always makes me either giggle or wet my pants laughing (very embarrassing for an elderly personage I must say). But besides those little inconveniences theyve cheered me up a lot. Thank you.
Regards
Splurts both ways.