The other day I was shopping in a fancy department store (which shall remain nameless – I’m not giving them a scrap of publicity).
As I was leaving, I presented my handbag for inspection. The security guard had a good look and then told me the lining was coming undone, there was a dirty stain on the outside and that the bag itself was a cheap imitation! I was mortified!
They’re supposed to be checking for stolen goods, not passing judgement on customers’ personal taste. Is there some unwritten law I’ve not heard of?
In The Bag
Dear In The Bag,
It’s not an unwritten law – it’s the Undesirable Customers With Cheap Tacky Possessions Act 1995, and it’s the real reason people’s bags are inspected when leaving a shop.
Upmarket department stores go to a lot of trouble to create and maintain a certain ambience. Luxurious decor, gentle warbling muzak, overdressed sales assistants with tight, immovable faces and phoney smiles. But all of this can be ruined if any old rubbish can just walk in off the street. A strategy is required to create embarrassment so the offending customer doesn’t ever come back.
Hope this helps.
With kind regards,