My 95-year-old auntie died a few days ago. For some reason the family has asked me to deliver the eulogy at the funeral.
My problem is that I’m terrified of public speaking. But my auntie was popular, so there’ll be a whole church full of old ladies sitting there, listening. Looking at me. Judging me. What can I do?
Dear Funeral Freak-Out,
I’d suggest a Powerpoint presentation. You can do some really great things now with custom animation, dissolving slide transitions and SmartArt graphics. As a bonus it might even be reasonably moving.
But the best thing is that no-one will be looking at you. They’ll all be staring at the screen with that blank, glazed-over look that Powerpoint always inspires. And by Slide 29, their tears will be of boredom. And what’s a funeral without tears? It’s win, win.
Hope this helps.
With kind regards,