I’m famous on YouTube for lighting my farts. But the other day I gave my brother third degree burns because he got too close.
Mum’s blaming it all on me, but that’s totally not fair! It was my stupid brother’s fault coz he’d been drinking beer all afternoon which made him more flammable. Plus he could hardly walk straight. He shouldn’ta got in the way.
I’m right, aren’t I, Yak?
Dear Natural Gas,
I’ve considered your question very carefully. And everything you’ve just told me only confirms what I’ve thought for a long time – that some humans should eat their young.
Hope this helps.
With kinds regards,